Written on February 21st, 2012 by sassymomno shouts
Being a parent always has its challenges and rewards especially when you have a teenage girl. There are a lot of pressure from people around them coupled with their raging hormones and the struggle to find a place in society. That is why it is important for parents to always be there for our teenage kids.
Recently, I had a chance to bond and share my hip and trendy beauty regimen with my teenage daughter. She attended her first prom night last weekend. We all know that for any girl, attending a prom is a milestone in our lives.
The preparation started a month before by choosing her gown, the next week would be the shoes and then I had to have her accessory customized for her gown.
The days before were dedicated to beauty preparation such having her nails done, waxing, threading, etc. And of course, the day itself has to be for the hair and make up. Oh my! My husband could only sigh at the preparation for this event.
Well, it was worth it. My daughter enjoyed the night. I feel so good to be able to be with her during the momentous occasion in her life. I know that this will have a significant and lasting effect on her. Even the smallest things count when it comes to spending time with our children, such as being there during their performances, going with them to buy their kikay stuff such bags, shoes, and even lingerie. Just to hear to your child say “Thank you!” is the most rewarding experience of all. Nothing beats that!
“Kids go where there is excitement. They stay where there is love.” - Zig Ziglar
Written on February 16th, 2012 by sassymomno shouts
It’s been awhile since I have had that “kilig” feeling. And it’s nice to see my teenage daughter share her “kilig moments” with me. Well, I am not suppose to go into the details to respect her privacy, I am just glad to see my daughter opening up to me. Even hubby was surprised to know that my daughter even shares here SMS messages to me. LOL!
I was once there (We all are, aren’t we?) and I know how that shivers get into your spine and you just want to shout out and tell the world. As for me, I only had my friends to share it with — since Mom was kinda strict. That is the very reason why I made it a point to open the communication lines between me and my daughter.
I read this in Twitter today from an anonymous source:
“To be old & wise, you must first have to be young & stupid.”
Which is quite true, you need to be able to explore all the emotions in these world for you to have the wisdom to discern. To love like you’ll never be hurt is the way to live your life. One should not close their doors to any emotions just because they are afraid of being hurt. Emotions are merely the mental state which arises from spontaneity. It is not a conscious effort therefore we can control it. Not to say, that we should welcome sadness or grief into our lives, but we need to accept that it is a part of our lives.
Going back to my teenager, time and again, I am reminded that soon she will spread her wings. It’s seems like yesterday when she requested me to have “Disney Princess” for her pillow and bed sheets, or have that neon stars on the ceiling so she could see them when she sleeps, or even have her choice of kids switch plate covers for her bedroom lights. Time really flies so fast.
***kilig - is that shivery, fuzzy feeling that you get whenever you are infatuated.
Written on February 25th, 2011 by sassymomno shouts
Raising a teenager can pose a lot of challenges especially if you have a girl. Aside from the rigors of their academic life there are other things to consider such as peer pressure and extra-curricular activities, you have to deal with their hormonal changes. The feeling that “No one understands me” is the last thing I want my daughter to feel. That is why I keep my communications open. However for some reason, they have this tendency to lock themselves up.
Everyone knows that there is no black and white rules in raising a teenager yet I know most parents would agree with me that it requires a lot of patience, persistence and determination. It can be a struggle but rewarding at the same time.
There are things that we, parents have to bear mind as we raise our teenagers. We should know these things, we’ve been there, right?
Keep your communication lines open – I believe this is the most important thing in any relationship. Even though we feel that they are still too young to discuss these things such as dating, puppy love, etc. Whatever you do, do not put a barrier. Sometimes, we are guilty of this. Once our daughter starts talking about a crush, we immediately block them and say…“You’re not suppose to be talking about that, you’re still too young!” Try not to be a spoiler. There are many ways to send your message, just let them finish first. Make an effort to be enthusiastic about their story, ask questions and then you inject your point.
What we don’t want our teenagers to feel is that nobody wants to listen and understand them. This will leave them feeling angry and confused. They will try to find the company of friends and acquaintances whom they feel understands them. Soon, you’ll find that they want to be with them than your family.
Setting the Rules – The rules in the house should have been set long before, while they were growing up. This way you only have to remind them that even if they are teenagers still need to abide by the rules. I add up by saying that older siblings should be a role model. A little responsibility wouldn’t hurt.
Privileges and Responsibility – Since they are old enough for some privileges, let them have it. Give them some leeway however remind them what Uncle Ben (Spider Man) said, “With great power comes great responsibilities.” If they want to go malling with friends, let them be. Teenagers are in the process of finding their own identity, their spot in this universe. As long as they know their limitations and you know the friends that they hang out with, that’s fine.
Talk about your fears – Do not be afraid to talk about your fears. It gives our children the proper perspective when they understand the “WHY?” Why are you not letting them go to an “open party” or go clubbing with friends? Discuss the dangers.
With my daughter, I didn’t feel the need to tell her not to drink when in a party. Huwaaat??? That would be the baffled reaction of my female friends. My reason — she will drink even if I told her not to. However, I have rules when it comes to drinking.
Don’t drink anything that is given to you.
Don’t leave your drink unattended, and if you should, don’t drink it again.
Drink in moderation.
The first two rules have a very good reason. We are trying to avoid “spiked drinks”. You know what happens when you gulp up a spiked drink.
Dealing with the different concerns of adolescence can leave all parties feeling exhausted. Understand that this is the most difficult years of growing up, families should work together to recognize the needs of of each family member in order to be successful at helping their children in their development. As parents, keep your end goal in mind — we are raising a responsible, God-fearing individual that will soon be a contributor to our society.
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Looking at the face of my daughter, I cannot help but feel pity on her. So much pimple on her left cheeks and her forehead. Poor face.
I kept reminding her to clean her face all the time especially after her cheer leading rehearsals since they almost always lie down on those mats which is obviously filthy because it’s the same mat they step on. Well, I guess the hormones of puberty is also a culprit. I just wish this phase will soon go away.
I just don’t want these acne to dampen her morale, they are especially sensitive when they are going through this phase.
Oh well, I just need to find an effective acne face wash for her to help heal those ugly zits.
Growing up my daughter was always the chubby one, which was cute for a growing child. She’s neither obese nor overweight but she isn’t petite also. At age 12, she started dieting without my knowledge. I was working then and I realized she was skipping dinner. Honestly, it worked! She grew out of the plump figure but then you’ll notice how her face has dropped as if she was sick. I got worried and told her to stop and explained to her that she might be losing on all the needed nutrients of her body. She is a good girl and obediently did what I asked to but told her just to maintain what she started.
Now that school is about to start, she is now back to controlling her food intake. Belonging to a cheerleading squad, I know where the pressure is coming from. However as a mom, I worry about her being obsessed on her body image that she might end up having an eating disorder.
My advice is to have a diet that is high in fiber which I would gladly take into consideration every time I do my grocery. It will not be only for her but for the whole family including me. Good thing, I have trained them to eat cereals every morning.
Fiber has a lot of important health benefits such as lowering of blood cholesterol and controlling the level of our blood sugar. Promoting the regularity of bowel movement and preventing constipation are the most important benefits fiber can give our body which is good for colon cancer prevention.
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Tonight this was the question my teenage daughter asked me, “Mom, when did you start having curves?” Honestly, I was astounded by the question. I told her not to think so much about her physical beauty, because she is beautiful as it is. I added that is not good to be conscious about her figure and weight.
I was forced to show her this video from Dove Campaign for Real Beauty. This was shared to me by my sister a couple of days ago through Facebook.
It is indeed a challenge to raise a young lady nowadays, most especially when their perception of beauty is what they see from fashion magazines and billboards. From the society and the fashion world that we live in now, they seem to define beauty as size O and perfect facial features. Thus putting so much pressure on young girls to look that way and it can be perilous.
Me and my hubby have had serious discussion as to how critical his role is being the first male authority in our young girl’s life. According to research as told by the book “Father Effects: How Your Father Influenced Who You Are and Who You Love,” it points out that young girls feel abandoned and rejected without their father’s presence in their growing up years. Growing up without a dad, I know that for a fact buy hey! I don’t blame anyone — Life is what you make it. However, as a parent, I learn from those mistakes and try to be better parents to my children. Hubby is not the touchy and showy type of person but he understands the importance of being a more active parent, it’s a work in progress.
Nevertheless, as a father, hubby is good at explaining things, like a teacher. He helps our daughter understand beauty in a godly way. That looking beautiful is not a bad thing but vanity is not good either. It is our role to enlighten her on the true meaning of beauty. Such as wearing modest clothes so as not to attract lust on the opposite gender and most importantly living a happy, healthy life that will radiate her beauty inside and out even without adornments and cosmetics. We try to influence her on being positive each and every day.
More than once, I have told my daughter that she is beautiful not only because I am her mother but she truly is. Love and assurance is essential in building up her self esteem in order for her to radiate beauty without having to compare herself with the standards of today’s society.